I am a year 5 at Hornby Primary School. This is a place where I will be able to share my learning with you. Please note....some work won't be edited - just my first drafts, so there may be some surface errors. I would love your feedback, comments, thoughts and ideas.
You are writing from the viewpoint of one of the swimmers OR that you are one of the whales. Think about how you would describe the setting that you are in.
How are you going to create atmosphere in your writing?
What sort of language are you going to use to create tension and suspense and tell the reader that you are thinking and feeling?
WALT write a descriptive piece of writing through the eyes of someone who is dreaming that they are swimming with whales OR that they are a whale.
We need to focus on these things:
Full stops, capital letters
To start with you will write a description of the first scene, now describe what it is like as you move through the underwater landscape.
Use the show not tell technique to create thoughtful writing. You are writing through the eyes of somebody who is dreaming that they are swimming with whales. Create suspense and tension you swim through the water, it is as if you belong there.
Go to thisWhale Fantasia PADLET and start writing your ideas, words feelings adjectives, onomatopoeia, similes and metaphors.
Once this is completed you can publish it on your personal blog.
It was 6 o'clock in the morning and I haven’t slept all night because of this day. I quickly got my togs on and ran to the beach, the waves crashed into the shore like a tornado.
I didn’t want to go in the water so I just looked at the view. I stayed there from 6 o’clock until about 12 because the view was so beautiful I couldn't take my eyes off it. As I was walking to the water I could feel the seaweed it was as slimy as spaghetti.
I dived into the water like a dolphin and the water was as cold as ice. The deeper I went the darker it was. As I went deeper I could see more sea animals. I saw swordfish with their noses as sharp as a knife.I saw electric eels that glowed like glowworms in a cave.
As I was swimming in the cold blue ocean I came upon three big whales, they were as big as a classroom. I felt like I was in a big fishing tank. After looking at the whales I swam up to the top of the water, then I decided to go home so I swam back to shore.
The sand was so hot as hot as an oven as it burnt my feet. I ran across the sand and got an ice cream. Then all of a sudden I woke up in my bed,looked around and I realised that the whole thing was a dream.